An Overwhelming Horror- Unfinished Story/Interactive Experiment

Ok so before I begin this story I want to iterate that it is NOT finished and I don’t remember where I was going with it so it likely won’t ever BE finished.

With that said I’ll be providing the 4 chapters I had managed to write way back in time, and what I want from you, the viewer is to comment your own chapter to ride off from the end of my story.

Perhaps others could add their own chapters to the end of yours and we could be a community inputting our own ideas into what happens next :).

Chapter 1 was done on January 10th 2006 @11:57pm

Chapter 2 was done January 21st 2006 @10:20am

Chapter 3 was done February 15th 2006 @11:02pm

Chapter 4 was done September 30th 2006 @12:53pm

An Overwhelming Horror (Chapter 1)

Nothing matters anymore to Aidan, a guy in blood-covered overalls and a mask like that of Jason Voorhees… Growing up Aidan loved watching horror movies, it became like an obsession and every single movie in his collection was rated R.

Aidan is now a twenty-six year old man and lives in a little shack-like house boat out on a lake, a lake that nobody knows about. By now Aidan don’t know the difference between reality and fantasy and every night he does the same thing, taking fantasy from his movies and making them into reality for his own sick twisted mind.

Tonight is the night of Marti-Gra and Aidan has put on his overalls and mask and went off to Marti-Gra to find him a victim…

At Marti-Gra he found two ladies who looked liked twins dressed up like kitty cats and he motioned for them to come over, knowing from experience they were the trusting type. They came over right away and in no time the two girls Courtney and Jessica were on their way home with Aidan.

“You know Marti-Gra is a bad time to trust people… I mean everyone is in costume and you never know when you might be with a killer.” Aidan said casually as they went into his house.

“Oh Jess and I don’t believe in that kind of crap, I mean seriously nothing remotely interesting has ever even happened in this city~” said Courtney getting cut off by Jessica “Whoa Courtney! Don’t you ever watch the news?…I mean people go missing in this city all the time! None of them have been found dead but still it doesn’t mean they’re alive.”

“She’s right.” said Aidan from the kitchen. “What are you doing?” asked Jessica to Aidan when she noticed he was in the kitchen. “Oh I thought you ladies might like a drink.” he answered bringing in a platter with three wine glasses on it. “Oh thanks.” said Courtney quickly grabbing a glass and taking a sip. Jessica took hers off the platter slowly saying “Thank you~” almost under her breath.

“So are you two twins?” asked Aidan taking his glass, putting the platter down on the table, and sitting in a chair. “Oh no I am twenty-two and Courtney’s going to be next month, we are actually BFF’s.” said Jessica. “Uhh BFF?” said Aidan sort of confused…” Best Friends Forever.” said Courtney straightening it out. “Oh oh yeah…of course heh sorry.” said Aidan acting like he understood.

“Um where’s your bathroom?” asked Jessica five minutes later. “Uhh umm well uh just go down this hall and down a couple of steps and turn left, there will be a door to your immediate left…go through that and it is at the end of the hall.” replied Aidan trying to show her with hand gestures. So she went in search of the bathroom, leaving Courtney alone with Aidan.

When Jessica got to the end of the hall right in front of the bathroom she noticed a light flickering in a room to the right. She slowly looked over at the door until curiosity got the best of her and she slowly opened the door. Inside were newspaper clippings all over the walls, going on into the room she looked at the clippings closer and noticed each one was a report about someone declared missing and thought to be dead.

“What are you doing in here!” yelled Aidan who had come up behind Jessica and nearly gave her a heart attack “OH! … I was just on my way to the um the bathroom and I noticed a light flickering from under the door so I thought I’d see if it was shorting out~” said Jessica in a faint voice.

“Did you make it to the bathroom?” Aidan asked, “No not yet, like I said I was on my way.” Jess replied. “Well why don’t we stay outta here okay.” said Aidan in an ever so eased manner while walking her out of the room. “Wa-wait! why do you have all these clippings all over the wall?” asked Jessica afraid she might have done something stupid. “…… I’m a detective.” was all he replied. “Oh…okay, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to intrude.” she said. “That is alright you didn’t know now why don’t you go ahead and go to the bathroom so that you can get back to the living room so we can find something fun to do.” said Aidan smiling “Okay.” said Jessica as they parted ways.

Jessica opened the bathroom door and walked into the dank dim lit room. There were years of rust in the sink and toilet and chipped tiles on the wall. She thought it was disgusting but after Aidan scared the crap out of her she really had to pee so she went ahead and used the toilet, then she turned on the sink to wash her hands but no water came out, so she turned the knob back so that it would be off. Before she left she heard a dripping coming from the tub so she opened the shower curtain and quickly backed up screaming as she fell back against the wall.

In the tub was a pool of blood filling about half the tub and floating organs including a girls head, brains, guts, and surprisingly a fetus… Jessica sat there in the floor against the wall screaming and crying surprised that no one came to find out why~

An Overwhelming Horror (Chapter 2)

Jessica sat against the wall freaked out with her arms around her legs and her eyes pressed deep into her knees crying, until she heard a boat start up and drive off. She quickly got up and ran down the hall to peer out the tiny window and see Aidan riding off back toward the shore. “Bastard” she said almost in a whisper, suddenly she heard Courtney moan in the living room and rushed in,

“COURTNEY!…(she bent down so she was face to face with her) we have to get out of here! Aidan’s a lunatic!” Jessica yelled to Courtney who had been drugged through her drink and had just awakened after passing out right after Jessica had left to find the bathroom.

“Ah I don’t feel so good~” said Courtney holding her head and trying to stand. She fell back down where she’d been sitting and Jessica ran into the dingy kitchen and started looking through the cabinets for some sort of smelling salt or aspirin. Then she noticed a little bottle by the bottle of wine Aidan had poured for them earlier, she picked it up and smelled of it…

Jessica ran back to Courtney… “Courtney you’ve been drugged!… Look we have to…” Jessica stopped talking quickly when she heard a boat again and ran back to the tiny window to see Aidan coming back.

Jessica ran back and helped Courtney up saying “Come on! He’s coming back, we’ve gotta hide!” and they made their way frantically through the house.

By the time Aidan had gotten into the house Jessica and Courtney were in the basement, quiet as can be… Jessica started looking around and found a big table with a white sheet over it so they got under it in case he came in there.

Courtney had backed up against the wall and it suddenly crumpled behind her and she started to fall backward, with her reflexes intact she grabbed a hold of Jessica and they both fell into the darkness screaming.

Aidan had heard their screams echo and he just listened and smiled cause he knew he wouldn’t have to kill them now there was no way they could escape. Aidan knew exactly where the two girls would end up so he dropped the rope he had went into town to get. He figured sense he would not need it for them now he would go back to the Marti-Gra to try to pick up someone else. So he left again…..

However Jessica and Courtney had fell down the long dark hole and they hit the bottom with a loud [THUD!] Both girls lie there unconscious they had been knocked out by the great distance of the fall but they weren’t dead…yet~

An Overwhelming Horror (Chapter 3)

When Jessica came to she struggled to her feet and looked around to gather her surroundings, then she looked over at Courtney who was still unconscious.

Jessica bent down and started gently shaking Courtney to try to make her wake up…

“Courtney WAKE UP!” yelled Jessica and as Courtney started to come to Jessica stopped shaking her.

“Huh oh uh…what happened? (looks around) where are we?” asked Courtney in a daze.

“I don’t know, it looks like some kind of mine shaft or something…maybe a cave……but at least we’re away from that maniac, I mean that has to be some kind consolation right?” said Jessica

“I guess so but now how do we get out of here?” asked Courtney starting to panic

“I don’t know I guess we just start walking I mean this place has to have an exit…(looks back where they fell from) and this sure the hell isn’t it.” said Jessica

They both started walking down the only path which was dimly lit with a few sorted placed wall torches, but soon the one path turned into eight separate paths.

“Oh great now what!” Courtney panicked again

“We choose…either we stick together and pick a path or we go separate directions and try to find an exit.” said Jessica trying to keep a level head.

“Oh no there is no way in hell I am going anywhere in here by myself!” Courtney screamed, freaking out.

“Alright let’s go this way then..” said Jessica as they started down the rightmost path.

A ways down the path they came to another fork this time a two-way one going straight and the other going left…they heard something down the straight path and started backing down the left path.

Suddenly something in the shadows came out behind them and grabbed Courtney tearing her to shreds, as soon as Jessica heard the ear-shattering screams of her best friend she spun around and cupped her hands over her nose and mouth and screamed.

Crying all the while Jessica sprinted down the straight path not thinking or caring about what she had heard down the path before, all she knew was there was no way past that monster and the way they came was a dead end and she would get lost going aimlessly down one of the other paths.

She saw a steel door at the end of that path, rushed through it, shut the door tight, and turned the valve to lock it and crying she started to slide down the door…but she suddenly heard a scream from behind her, turned around and screamed herself.

“Who are you?” asked Jessica trying to find her heart again

“Who are you?” asked the other girl crying which she looked like she had been doing for days.

Jessica looked out the tiny window in the door trying to see the monster.

“…it can’t come in here.” said the other girl knowing what Jessica was doing.

“Why wasn’t this locked before if you were hiding in here?” asked Jessica

The girl looked over at a little opening…

“I’ve been hiding back there…That thing couldn’t reach me under that.” she answered.

“……My name’s Jessica.” Jessica finally said after she felt comfortable enough.

“I’m Alice.” the other girl said next.

“Alice…the same Alice that went missing with some friends two months ago?” asked Jessica remembering her face and details on a news report on TV last month called [THE SEARCH CONTINUES].

“…yeah~” Alice answered reluctantly

“Well….what happened to your friends?” Asked Jess.

“I don’t know what happened to Crystal, last I saw her she was in this guy named Aidan’s boat-house…and I got separated from Bianca, Lexi and Jocelyn here in the cave at the eight way cross paths…We all went different ways and now I regret it.” answered Alice.

“How have you survived two months down here?” asked Jessica when she started thinking.

“Well convenience I guess…you see there is an underground spring back that way (points down a narrow path in the room) and off to an edge down that path is loads of food…. I think this was meant to be a bomb shelter or something.” Alice answered.

Jessica slid down the steel door with her back against it, put her elbows on her knees, and put her hands on her head and started crying again.

“What’s wrong?” asked Alice immediately

“…My best friend was just killed by that monster out there~” Jessica choked out still crying.

Suddenly something banged against the door and Jessica shot up, screamed, and backed over next to Alice crying louder now then she was a minute ago. The banging continued for about five more times as the two girls hunched down together and squished back against the wall.

Suddenly the banging stopped and after a few minutes hearing nothing Jessica slowly got up and went over to the door. She looked out the window and suddenly the monster came up full force and crashed into the door with its full body weight. Jessica ran back over and pulled Alice to her feet.

“Come on! We have to get out of here, (looks terrifyingly toward the steel door)that door isn’t going to hold much longer!~” almost before Jessica could finish that line the door crashed to the ground and the monster crept in slowly breathing and sniffing.

An Overwhelming Horror (Chapter 4)

“It can’t see us if we’re not in its path.” whispered Alice as the beast came further into the room. “Are you sure?” asked Jessica quietly as the two girls scooted along the wall. “Yes it’s how I was able to make it to this room in the first place…” Alice replied.

“I have an idea…when that thing turns we make a mad dash for the door and keep running.” said Jessica, “Gotcha.” said Alice as they slid closer to the door and kept a close eye on the beast.

When the beast started to turn and got his body away from the doorway the two girls rushed out and ran back to the two-way where the beast came out, as Alice started to go back to the eight way split Jessica grabbed her arm…

“Wait! that thing came from that direction (she said looking down the path where her and Courtney had backed up earlier) maybe it was guarding the exit or something…let’s go this way.” Jessica said as they slowly went down the pitch black path.

It came to a big open circular room where a torch was mounted on the back wall above a lever. “Wait here I’m going to go get the torch so we can see better.” said Jessica as she started to sprint across the middle of the floor.

About halfway across the room she stepped on a floor trigger which lit up the whole room and Jessica stopped dead in her tracks. She tried to look up but the lights were almost blinding and she couldn’t see anything, but Alice could see from where she was standing…

“JESSICA RUN!” Alice screamed as the lights started to dim… Jessica turned toward Alice and when the lights weren’t as strong she looked back up and gasped when she saw nine more of those beasts clinging to the ceiling. They were smaller than the one they had temporarily outsmarted and they had been sleeping, but she woke them when she stepped on the trap and they all fell from the ceiling, making a complete 180 degree turn in the air to land on their feet.

Jessica looked back at the lever on the wall and when one of the monsters swiped at her she rolled across the floor, quickly got back to her feet, and rushed over to it. Looking back at the nine monsters blocking her ONLY exit she pulled the lever and it collapsed the floor tile beneath Jessica and Alice, dropping them down into an underground water way.

Jessica got up and dusted off her jeans and ripped off what was left of her kitty costume, then she rushed over to Alice who had landed face first in the water. She lifted her up and patted her back trying to get her to come to.

Suddenly Alice spit up water and gasping and coughing said “What happened?”

“I don’t know… I hit the lever and the floor came out from under me, well at least we’re away from those…creatures.” Jessica said trying to stay positive about their grim situation.

“Yeah maybe…but now where are we?” asked Alice staggering to get back up on her feet. “It looks like a water way…look the water’s moving, it has to came out somewhere, come on let’s follow it.” said Jessica grabbing Alice’s hand and running alongside the water.

They came out on a cliff overlooking the lake and Aidan’s boat house. “That’s the place I last saw Crystal… I hope she got away from him, she was going to have a baby in four months~” Alice started to cry as she spoke.

“A baby…did Crystal have short black hair?” Jessica reluctantly asked. “Yeah…Why, have you seen her?” Alice asked hopeful. “Umm, well, I think so…but she was dead.” Said Jessica regrettably. “What, no~…how?” Alice wondered. “I don’t know, I just found the fetus and some body parts in the bath tub.” Jessica told Alice. “OH MY GOD!…That man isn’t human, he’s a sick twisted son of a bitch who deserves to die!” Alice cried. “Death’s too good for him~” said Jessica to herself.

After they both gathered their emotions and surroundings Jessica said “Aidan’s boat gone again…come on we can jump in the water and swim to boat house…from there we should able to walk to town.

Just before Jessica jumped Alice grabbed her arm and pulled her back screaming “STOP! we can’t jump!” Jessica looked at Alice and said “Why? Can’t you swim?” Alice replied, “That’s not it (She pointed to the water) look there’s alligators down there.”

Jessica looked down at the five alligators circling below them, “Whoa, thanks, I owe you one.” she told Alice then she looked around and saw a path coming out of some woods near the cave entrance. The path went to a bridge that crossed the water. Jessica pointed to it and said, “There…We have to get that bridge.”

“How do we get down there from here?” asked Alice hysterically. “We gotta go back and see if there is another way to go.” she answered. So they went back through the water way slowly Jessica checking the right side and Alice checking the left.

“Here…” said Alice. Jessica ran over to where Alice was standing, Sure enough there was a pipe like slide coming out of the left side wall. Alice looked at Jessica and said, “Are you sure we should do this?” “It’s either give it a try to risk getting killed, jumping off into the gator infested water and no doubt get killed, or stay here until we die of thirst or hunger.” she replied.

Both girls took a deep breath and slid down the long twisting pipe slide, they landed outside in a wooded area.

What happens next?

Well I’ll leave that to you to decide, this is as far as I got and wrote it back in 2006…

I no longer remember what plans I had for it so I’m dropping this as an “Interactive Experiment”,

you make the next chapter, maybe someone can come in behind you and make the next one.

Also it doesn’t HAVE to be a 1 chapter sequel,

if you write Chapter 5 and someone else doesn’t see it or wants it to go another way they can do that.

There can be multiple “Chapter 5’s” and if someone wants to make a “Chapter 6” to a particular Chapter 5 path,

Reply to that persons comment with your Chapter 6 🙂

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6 thoughts on “An Overwhelming Horror- Unfinished Story/Interactive Experiment

  1. Thanks for sharing this interesting and i must say really captivating story. You’ve done a really great job putting this together, the part I felt most concentrated was when they saw the alligators cycling below them, not even one, Jessica saw five, I was kinda shock at first that they’ll be harmed but thanks to you for nice idea of continuity. I’ll look forward to seeing the continuation.

    1. Thank you, I wrote the last chapter (chapter 4) about 7 months after the 3rd Chapter and then kinda forgot about it, I don’t remember where I was going with it now (as it’s been 14 years) which is why I’d like to see where others would take the story.  I may sit down and try to make more if I can pick my brain a bit to see if I can remember anything at all I had planned for the direction for it.

  2. Really overwhelming, this is a story I’ve actually never thought would draw this much of my attention, you have tried a lot in making it as captivating as possible and creating a kind of cohesion from one paragraph to another. I enjoyed the chapter 4 to the fullest, the suspense was very nice and it made it very interesting. 

    1. Thank you, I remember back when I wrote it these stories kind of played out like a movie in my head so trying to put it to paper was a bit tough, trying to explain what I saw and how it played out and I really wasn’t sure the audience would see it through words as I did in my mind.  I’m glad it kept your attention.

  3. I have been very delighted to read this lovely story of yours, at first, i thought it was going to be a very scary thing to read but getting to make advances towards each paragraph made me realise I just stumbled on the best story I’ll read this year. I want to know what happened to Jessica and Alice after. Thanks for giving the chance for people to add their idea.

    1. Thank you I realized after rereading this from when I wrote it there’s so much out of place and corny (like a basement in a boat house and a “trap” that wakes monsters on the ceiling…) I remember just trying to put the movie playing out in my head to paper, which is what this became.  Since I’m not sure I’ll ever finish it I thought it deserves AN ending so why not let the community of Horror Story fans help give it some chapters (possibly up to an ending)  I thought it’d be a cool idea and give people an outlet for their own storytelling (I’m just giving them a theme to work with :))

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